This is the first novel in the Fall and Rise series by Chelsea M. Cameron.
Going to college is a fresh start for Charlotte "Lottie" Anders. She went to the same college as her twin
brother, Will, and doesn't know a lot of the students there, so she can start over.
Except her past is coming back to haunt her. Namely, the Parker brothers, Zack and Zan.
They are both responsible for Lottie's best friend, Lexie, getting into a car accident two years ago and made her forget everything, even her best friend. Now, Lexie will never be able to go to college, fall in love again, get a job. She will just be a little girl in mindset.
So when Lottie realizes that the two people she hates the most in the world is at the same college as her, and even living in the same dorm building as her, she was extremely mad at life.
And even worse? Lottie's new roommate, Katie, is dating Zach, the worst of the Brother's of Doom. Zach has always given Lottie the creeps rather than had her panting after him. But the opposite could be said about how Lottie feels about Zan. Even though he was the one who was driving when the car accident happened.
With the help of her brother, Simon (Will's roommate and friend), and her new coworker, Trish, Lottie has been able to somewhat avoid seeing Zan.
But only for a little bit. Lottie realized that she's always thinking about him, wondering what he is doing and what he does when they aren't in the same room. But how can she have feelings for Zan knowing what he did?
Zan has had a crush on Lottie since he first saw her in grade school. Just when he decides to finally talk to her, he ruins her life and the life of her best friend. Now he's just watching from afar, wondering "what if" and wishing that he was a different person.
And even though Zan knows Lottie hates him, he still finds ways to talk to her and be around her. Even though it's wrong, Zan is always wishing that things were different between the two of them.
Secrets come out and friends get hurt. Can Zan and Lottie ever be together, or is their past too strong to overcome? How can they possibly find common ground if, when they look at each other, the past is staring them straight in the face? Read Deeper We Fall by Chelsea M. Cameron to find out!
Just a forewarning, this is a NEW ADULT novel, which means that it's a little bit more mature and graphic than a YA novel but not too racy like an adult novel. Mainly, New Adult (NA) novels are set in college and are about characters who are starting to grow up, but still do things that are immature.
I've read this book twice now, and definitely loved it both times! I think what I loved the most was Zan's point of view. He knew that he could never have Lottie, but that didn't change his feelings toward her or what he wished could happen.
Zan is really quiet, so I'm glad Cameron wrote in his perspective as well. Then the reader got to see what he was thinking, not necessarily what he was saying out loud.
And the inner struggle Zan had was agonizing. He had this secret that two people knew, and not the people he wanted to know. Plus, he had to live with Zack, be related to him. That in itself is torture. Zack is a jerk and definitely acts like a spoiled boy who gets away with everything.
I had a little bit more trouble with liking Lottie than Zan. Yes, she was going through her own inner struggle on dealing with Zan. Yes, he caused the accident that injured Lexie forever. But the blaming game? Not good for anyone - especially after two years. That can ruin a person's life.
I also really liked that the deep dark pasts of the characters involved the other person. It was more of a struggle to overcome because they had to deal with the past, present and sometimes the future.
Overall, I really enjoyed this book! I think other New Adult lovers will like this as well. I think it's a little darker than some other NA that I've read, but that's just me.
For anyone wanting an edgy, dark, but "light at the end of the tunnel" New Adult novel, I would definitely recommend picking this up!